There is always more to a situation than what can be seen on the surface. Pain and offense come from viewing actions at face value. “If we could read the secret history of our enemies, we should find in each man’s life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility.” -Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
If we take time to search ourselves BEFORE reacting to the negative actions of others, we can prevent negative outcomes from manifesting in our own lives. When we react impulsively, we open the door to regret, miscommunication, anger, bitterness, sorrow, loss, and hurt on a potentially astronomical level. I’m sure we have all been told at some point in our lives to take a deep breath or count to ten when upset. We are given these tools because they are basic building blocks to self control and can help us to redirect our energy while we compose our thoughts. Don’t just use these tools, expand them. Keep in mind that relationships are not people, but they suffer and die due to the egos of people.
At the same time, we must remember that not all people are deserving of our intuitive energy. You will benefit a great deal from knowing when to peacefully walk away from situations that do not serve you and with love in your heart, close the door. It’s a delicate balancing act, but the running theme is YOUR action and the driving force behind it. What I mean by this is, when you close the door, do not slam it or close it out of anger or hatred or as an act of bitterness, but rather close it because you have entered a new space. You are not leaving the door cracked, you are are not locking the door and throwing away the key, you are just closing it peacefully.
I try my best to live my life in such a way that I am not leaving a wake of destruction as I move through difficult stages. Here are the golden rules I live by:
- Do not respond when you are hurt or angry
- Do not make promises (feelings are fluid and subject to change)
- Do not make decisions when you are sad or angry (take a nap or walk instead)
- Do not make threats, take positive action
- Listen more, speak less
- Breathe, just be, ask for help, take time out
As within, so without…if you can bring yourself peace, imagine the peace you can be for someone else. How will you choose to live today?
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